BY EDITOR SHAUNA SKYE
I’ve noticed certain irritating noob behavior over my years in Second Life. I generally don’t let my irritation show, but must admit that I do sigh inwardly. If the person is truly new and they do some of the things on my list of peeves below, it’s usually forgivable (depending on what it is), but when it’s an older SL user doing it . . . . I refer to the offender as “the noob” but in reality this could be someone who has been around a long time who just happens to act like one.
Noob begs for lindens. Even if you explain to the noob that Lindens translate into real money, and that other people buy them or earn them inworld, they usually don’t get it. Some have told me they’re just too lazy to earn the lindens, and don’t want to buy them. Well, that’s not my problem is it? If the noob is spending time on Second Life they most likely own a computer and have an internet connection, so it’s not like I’m denying food to a homeless person if I refuse. If anything, I’m probably preventing them from buying ugly shoes, tipping a lap dancer, or turning themselves into a more sophisticated furry avatar (no offence Feral).
A noob teleports in and asks “What is this place?” I always wonder why they ask this. I mean, they somehow got to the location they’ve arrived at, right? They must have searched for something, or if they were given a landmark surely the person who sent them told them something? Often places will have information from notecards that automatically pop up as you arrive, or they have info right on the landing point . . . and yet even at these places noobs ignore all of it and ask “What is this place?” Uh, how about taking ten seconds to look around before asking? Even the places with no description, if you just explore for a few seconds, you can get a clue of it.
Noob asks questions that if they just took half a second to open a profile they’d know immediately. Ok, if this is a person’s first day in Second Life they may not know they can open a profile. For real newbies, this is forgivable. It’s when someone who has been in SL for months, even years, does it that it’s sigh-worthy. Please, open a profile and at least skim it before asking questions that could be answered with just a glance.
Noob asks real life questions that my friends hadn’t asked til they knew me for over a year or more, or in fact never asked and just waited politely for me to reveal it. This has to be the most boring thing a person can do in Second Life. A noob teleports in and within less than a second after “hello” (or even before a proper hello) they ask how old I am, if I’m married, if I want to dance/hook up/cyber, what my real life job is, if I have a picture . . . . the list goes on. They also ask other questions they could easily know if they just . . . opened my profile! Some of their questions would be impolite even in real life, but that aside, if I come to Second Life I’m not logged in to talk about those things, and I’m not on a speed dating website . . . so why are they talking to me as if I’ve just put an ad in the personals?
Refers to Second Life as “a game” or as “playing Second Life.” This is forgivable if it really is someone’s first few days in SL. New people sometimes sign up and their only experience has been with online games. After spending a bit of time though, people should realize that SL is a virtual world, not a game. I would no more say “I’m playing Second Life” than I would say “I’m playing the internet.” Are there games in Second Life? Sure! All kinds. There’s games on the internet too.
Noob moans about how bored they are. This often comes from people who login to Second Life once a year or refer to SL as “a game.” Really, if I just meet you and you’re so bored, I’ll show you the spot on the menu to logout. If a friend says to me they are bored that’s one thing: I may do a tap dance for them. But if I have never met you and you come whining to me . . . do I look like a character from a video game that’s put there just to keep you from being bored? (Don’t answer that.) Hey, I’m not your entertainment center. Go ride a scooter!
Noob relates everything to sex. To this noob Second Life is 3D porn. It never occurs to him that people log in for other reasons.
Noob has no imagination whatsoever. They enter a virtual world constructed by its residents where the possibility for creativity abounds, a place you can meet people from all over the world, a place to play all kinds of games, even roleplay if that’s your thing; basically you can find new stuff to see all the time, you can educate yourself, you can look at art, you can have a fantasy or even “keep it real” if you prefer. And yet they “don’t understand the point of Second Life.” Why do people get together and dance? What purpose does it serve? With that kind of thinking what purpose does any of it serve? Why bother having music and art? Why make love except for reproduction? Let’s just work, eat, and sleep. All else serves no purpose. What is the point of Second Life you ask? Well, what is the meaning of life???
I’ll end on that note. What’s the meaning of life? Something to think on until next time . . . .