Second Life is Not Playstation

Posted on June 27, 2009
Filed Under Opinions/Gossip/People | 3 Comments

Contributed by Shauna Skye

Someone asked me to write an article to help people new to Second Life deal with emotional attachments and deep feelings which can occur within Second Life. I said I was more apt to offer help on How To Stop Your Hands From Typing, but thought well, maybe Dr. Shauna should give an opinion.

To begin with, the major mistake some make is in how they view Second Life. They come in thinking of it as a game rather than a virtual world, and while there are games within Second Life such as zyngo, shooting zombies, or roleplaying where you pretend to be vampires and kitty cats, Second Life is like the internet. The internet itself is not a game, but it has games. Second Life is not a game either–but it has them.

In the physical world our outward appearance can be an expression of ourselves in some ways. We can dress in certain styles, diet, have plastic surgery . . . but tomorrow we might be in an accident and end up looking nothing like we do now. Would that mean we were no longer ourselves? Isn’t it how we think which makes us who we are? When our minds are gone, the body is just a shell.

In Second Life we walk around as avatars; and what is an avatar but a vehicle for a mind? An avatar is a digital representation of ourselves, and one might say avatars are even more representative of the real us since we have more choice in how they look. An avatar can sometimes reveal more of what’s inside a personality than a physical body can.

Are Second Life relationships real? I’d say no less than those formed by other means such as talking on the phone or writing a letter. To say my friendship with a penpal is not real because we only communicate in letters would not be fair. My penpal and I may be even closer than people I physically see if we share more feelings. So how much more real is a SL relationship where you spend hours with a person in real time?

But what about the people who pretend to be something they’re not, you ask? A big concern is men using women avatars. Well, sure there’s room for deception, but people pretend in real life too. It’s easier to get away with being another gender in Second Life, but that does not mean “real” life can be any less deceptive. People wear masks everyday, and in fact may behave less like themselves in an environment where they are held accountable than in a virtual world like SL where they perceive no consequences and can remain anonymous. In SL a person can even switch to a different avatar if things get out of hand.

Sometimes people who want to behave certain ways will use the excuse that Second Life is just a game in order to do as they please. They behave with integrity in all ways except an area they want no restraint. SL is not a game to them, but when it comes to this one area suddenly “SL is just a game!” I’m not judging choices people make here, only that saying “it’s just a game” is not an excuse to do as you please. There are real people behind the avatars, so rather than using the “game” excuse just find others who are like minded and be honest about it.

I have no problem with the fact I sometimes feel emotional in Second Life since I’ve always viewed the place as a means of communicating rather than a game with unreal characters. My friends are great, and I’m not ashamed I have more in SL than everyday life right now. It’s just more convenient this way. People who say things to try to show how fulfilled they are in “real life” and try to insult those who feel close to SL friends (as if SL friends are less important) are “protesting too much” if you get my meaning. I know what it’s like to have a lot of friends in person. But the feelings I have for those in SL run no less deep, and in some cases far deeper.

So . . . are you struggling with the fact that you’re having feelings in Second Life? I’m not surprised if you come in viewing it as a game rather than a virtual world. But if you think of the place as a means of communicating rather than a playstation, you won’t be so shocked when someone you talk to actually elicits an emotional response from you.

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